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Why do we self-hate?  Why do we not accept the love of others?  It all speaks to self-esteem, and starting by learning how to love ourselves.

You're Too Focused on What You're Focused On

Short but succinct piece about our perceptions.  When our perceptions are unhealthy, or self-punishing, these thoughts cross over to--in CBT terms--"distortions of reality."

Here’s some good news for self-conscious people. That coffee stain on your shirt, those mismatched earrings you absent-mindedly selected this morning, that unfortunate haircut you just got — people do not notice those things as much as you think.
 
Here is the article from  the New York Times.